Dealing with the Loss of Loved Ones
How to handle grief during the holidays
Grief is a very real and physical experience. Death is hard. Losing a loved one can be the worst thing you’ve ever faced. It is also something that every single person will experience at some point in their life.
But grief isn’t just about the death of a loved one. Our grief comes to us in many ways: a broken relationship, being infertile, a debilitating illness. There are countless reasons for grief. But even though our pain is very personalized – we are not alone.
When my grandpa Cliff passed away in 1997, I plummeted into grief like it was my job. I fell apart on so many levels. I could barely enter a store or see another human without welling up into tears. It seemed as though everyone could see the pain I was in, but they couldn’t help, of course.
I didn’t know what to do with myself, and my tears they were not pretty little tears, no no – these were full-on waterworks. And to add to the misery, my nose was like Rudolf’s on Christmas Eve and could’ve lit the way for Santa’s sleigh!
My grandpa’s passing was before I had come out of my spiritual hiding about talking to the dead. This was such a difficult situation for me to handle, and I didn’t know what do with all the emotions and feelings that were bottled up within me. I would drive around aimlessly with my kids in the car just to avoid being home and seeing his house, which was right down the road from ours.
Then one day something changed.
I woke up with a new mindset and made a conscious decision to stop feeling bad about his leaving. It was like I had been stuck in a nightmare and then awoken. I actually was able to go into his house without feeling despair, rather I felt him. I was relieved of the pain and found his love waiting for me to hold again. This turn from suffering was a miracle, and I was ready to accept it as such.
The Angels say we either live with grief, as in “I have grief”, and then we continue to experience the flow of love and joy – or we can live with “I am grief”, and experience the pain of the loss over and over again.
The choice seems easy enough, but the reality is that grief is controlled by fear. The fear controls our thoughts, actions and reactions. It is, without doubt, a hard habit to break. Trust me on this, if your grief is controlling your life, and joy is nowhere to be found it is time to hit your knees and muster up the strength that I know you have inside to change.
God gifts us what we need, and I want to shine the light of love on your life and remind you that LOVE has your back – you just have to open the door to let it in, it’s all about your choosing love over fear, my friend.
Guilt is the Stopping Point
Here’s the thing, Love cannot flow where guilt is. Guilt will be the culprit behind all of our personal loss of joy and love after experiencing any type of grief. And the salt to our already wounded self is having to go through the holidays with this fucking pain, which in turn triggers our hidden feelings and emotions while reminding us of what we do not have.
The Truth of Loss
Since I’ve come out of the spiritual closet with my gift of connection and talking to the dead, I’ve learned so much about death, grief, trauma and life that I feel as if it’s my duty to share it with others. You see, we have been born into a nonpermanent physical life to experience, learn, grow and heal. This sounds easy, but it’s not!
There is a pathway for every living soul, and it leads to our rebirth into a Heavenly existence. Earth is our temporary home, and we are meant to experience all types of lessons and moments – our goal is to live this lifespan fully and love deeply. To do this, we must learn to open our senses and connect with the energy of the true life which is our existence with God.
Here’s the thing, our souls are infinite, and we never fully lose the connection to our loved ones or to God, we just lose faith in the reality that we can connect and continue our relationships beyond death in a brand new way. We can open to this heightened awareness by investing in our “you work” such as setting time to pray, meditate and to open our senses. These are the first steps to connecting with Divine love and our departed loved ones.
I’ve experienced some really amazing connections and witnessed a departed soul connect with their living loved one in amazing ways! Be it through a reading where I channel love, through a healing session and sharing a validating message or hearing from a client whose departed husband leaves her pennies from Heaven, reminding her of his undying love.
Miracle after miracle moment, I see, feel and know that the death of our loved one is not an ending.
One of my favorite ways to share the miracle of love is by leading people to experience the Heavenly realm for themselves through a guided meditation where they can see, feel, hear and sense their loved one. I call this experience Meditation with Heaven. The Angels led me to share this experience with people as a gateway for healing grief and suffering.
My gift to you
So, here’s the thing, we all have a choice in how we move forward from this or any given moment. We can choose love while embracing our grief, loving our memories and opening our hearts to continue to grow and experience all that life and God has for in store for us.
Or we can go forward with our guilt, which, trust me my friend, will strip you of your happiness and joy. Guilt serves only one master, and that is fear. Fear has propaganda to spread, and that is loneliness and isolation. Remember, though – you get to choose love over pain.
I know you want love, we all do, and you are stronger than the lies fear tells you.
My gift to you is simple, it is a reminder of your FREE WILL. God has gifted you this, and it is your right to choose how you go forward from this moment. You can do this, I know it, the Angels know it, God knows it – and now you do too!
May your holidays be cherished moments! God Bless.
I’ve created a video series to help you heal your grief. Watch it here…
Video #3 – Recognizing and Decoding Your Grief
Video #4 – The Other Side of Grief