Yellow Bug Girl

Yellow Bug Girl

The Empathic part of my knowing started as I felt the feeling of overdose in my gut. Then, I saw the sign of charcoal, and, I saw the word ACCIDENTAL over my head. I knew then she, the yellow bug girl, was no longer here.

The girl in the yellow bug drove down the dirt road, passing my car on her way out to town. As she waved and smiled, I wondered if that was her new car and decided it suited her.
I find it sort of odd how you can live so close to someone and know who they are, yet not know them, the real them. What I knew of yellow bug girl was that she was kind and compassionate. She took care of others every day at her work. I witnessed her taking care of our Nana. When Nana was moved to the nursing home from her town to be closer to our home, yellow bug girl came in to the room with a smile. She was there to help Nana out of her wheelchair. I remember the feeling of being relieved after we saw yellow bug girl working that day, the fact that someone we knew was watching over Nana gave us peace of mind.
Yet, we really did not know her…

The phone woke me from a restless night’s sleep. It felt like I had just fallen back asleep when that call came in. As I sit here now, in my bed not sleeping again, I am pondering, not only about today, but also the past few years. My mind is flooded with memories of when I first recognized Spirit’s voice. How grateful I am for this Spiritual gift of talking through the veil to loved ones, Angels, and guides.

Jason was on the other end of the phone as I answered in my sleepy voice, he gave me instructions to wake his brother Casey NOW and send him to the neighbor’s house, someone was not breathing. Without thinking, I jumped up and scrambled out of our room yelling back to my husband to wait one minute. He was asking what was going on and I was on a mission to get the message to Casey. As I headed up the stairs calling his name, he came out of the bathroom with Riley, our 3 year old granddaughter. Riley had woken up early, knocked down the gate at her door, and was looking for toys with which to play. Casey had heard her and got up to see what mischief she was causing. Riley announced, “I have to pee!” So, Casey had escorted her to the potty just as I was calling his name. He grabbed his shoes and ran out the door. Riley came running out of the bathroom ready to start her day…. at 6:30 am! I scooped Riley up and went back down to my husband explaining what was going on. We both looked at each other knowing the severity of the situation.

Had I not been connected to Spirit a few years back when my youngest child Molly was struggling is the thought just in front of my face tonight. We can all be open to Spirit’s guidance. When honored and respected, our gifts can serve and heal. Our talents can help us create a life of balance and love. It can help us flow with abundance.

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Abundance is free for all of us to receive.

 

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My boys are Earth Angels. They serve their community and country by volunteering their time. I can remember when my oldest son became a firefighter. I was in awe of his choice to join the firehouse. I was not sure even know where he got the idea to become a fireman. He loved his firetrucks when he was little, though. He would call them “firefucks” with a Boston accent! We do not understand where that came from! Jason is a leader with heart.

Casey joined the firehouse a couple years later when he was old enough. Casey is strong in areas that amaze me. He instinctively knows how to separate his emotions from this work. He is passionate about helping others. Casey amazes me with his strength, compassion, and knowledge.

After we had heard the news of yellow bug girls passing, we talked to Casey about what happened earlier that morning when he was able to revive yellow bug girl. I asked him if it was hard because he knew her and her parents. He said in few words as possible, which is so Casey, that he separates personal feelings from work. He did a job and that was all there was to it.

Other members of the firehouse came that day. They came to support their fellow brother, they came because that is what you do. They have a code; follow and stand by each other. I am grateful for those men and for their code!

We prayed for our boy and for the girl he was trying to save. We prayed for her parents and her only brother.

My husband had felt her leave, but was confused when the ambulance left because that signaled that she was alive… I explained what the Angels had shown me. I explained that she was in between being here and being in the veil. Her body was brought back to life but her soul was not all the way in her body.

We stood outside as the firemen and their vehicles left. Her parents followed the ambulance. It was a scene and feeling I won’t soon forget.

Casey had done his job as if it were any other day. The yellow bug girl’s father came over one day to express his gratitude toward Casey. He wanted to thank him in person for giving the family time to gather and say their goodbyes. With tears in his eyes he walked away, he turned and said, “Is he okay? I want to make sure Casey is okay.” His expression of concern, the tears welling in my eyes, he spoke through his tears, “He knew just what to do, he came in, and knew what to do.” I nodded; a heartfelt yes.

Yellow Bug Girl may have overdosed, but she lived and she was a beautiful person. She had a life filled with confusion and some pain. She self medicated with different things that gave her the happy feeling for which she was searching. It was a false sense of happy, which never lasted long and had a crashing down effect afterwards.

In death she is at peace, going to spiritual school. She has a sense of balance she did not have on Earth. She is still smiling, but now is filled with love she did not know before. She loves her family and wants them to know she is sorry that they had to find her in that way which they did. She did not mean to take her life, it came with the not being able to stop herself.

In loving memory of the Yellow Bug Girl.

Blessings,
Jeanne

Life, dogs, grief

Life, dogs, grief

A soul is a soul no matter if it is a furry friend or human. Sending your loved ones on their journey home with love, prayers and gratitude opens your heart even in the midst of sorrow.

Choosing to invite love of another soul back into your life is not a form or way to replace that souls place in you heart, rather it is a way to expand the heart.  The Goddess You  “Love is the constant. When you give your love to someone, you cannot take it away, for it is already there.”

I will share with you now how loosing my fur friends invited an expansion of love and healing to my life.

Tank came to our family one fateful winter day. My husband and I had been our annual trip of R&R after an unusually chaotic year. It was  January of 2012, and we were in need a break, big time! Let me recap 2011 for you, over the past year of crazy, my hubby going through turmoil with his business partner, I had chosen to close my shoe boutique in early February, our eldest daughter was married in the Spring and our eldest son’s wedding was in September, our next in line son graduated high school and was off to his first year of college in the fall, our youngest daughter was entering  her first year of high school, ohhhh and also our oldest daughter was expecting her first baby in November had moved in with us when her husband a Marine was deployed to Afghanistan in September.

In between all of our many happy and memorable family happenings our big pup Mighty Joe, an English mastiff was diagnosed with bone cancer after falling down some steps and breaking his leg in early fall. Joe wore a cast for a couple of weeks before falling once again from the unstable cancerous bones in his legs. Joe’s pain was horrible to watch, as we did our best to comfort our big guy with pain medicine and love we also guided his trips outside with a belt under his waist as we helped hold his weight and guide him so he  could do his “business”. After the second fall through things took a turn for the worst. Joe’s suffering was apparent in his lack of movement, our vet gently recommended we aid his journey and end his horrible pain and suffering.

 

Not being able to stand on his legs meant Joe could not move his large 210 lb body on his own anymore. We gathered together and agreed as a family to aid our Joe and end his suffering, not at all an easy decision but one we each believed was the right choice. We drove to the vet, Joe not being able to move his body any more my husband and boys backed my car up to the back deck and used a blanket to lift him from inside the house into my car, once at the vet’s office again they lifted Joe out under a big tree onto the lawn.  As our other family members arrived gathering around our Joe patting him, the vet administered the medicine. Joe slowly closed his eyes as he took his last breath with each of us by his side, sending him with our love and tears, keeping with us forever, his larger-than-life memory.

Tank was sitting there in his tiny bulldog puppy body. We were in Miami beach walking around, soaking in the last two days of our getaway. Our kids at home all nestled in from the wintery blast outside as we walk guilt free hand in hand restoring our energy for what life held for us next! There he was, a little brown and white pup all nestled in a glass enclosed window with tea cup puppies by his side. The shop was a small upscale puppy store the beaten track in south beach. Our kids had been all over the tea cup videos going around, so it was not hard for Brian to convince me to go into this shop, if only for a quick picture. Tank got up from his slumber upon seeing B! The owner took note and gathered the puppy up placing him on a carpeted area in front of us. I said this is a bad idea, remember no more dogs we both agreed. After Joe had passed our other dog Lovey had been crying, howling is more like it every day. The kids tried to soothe her with treats and love, but she missed her big guy as much as we all did. But now, standing here in the puppy shop filled with photos of famous people with their new pups and the owner shaking their hands I was scared! Scared I would have to take care of another puppy, scared that I would not have freedom to do what I wanted to do because I would have a baby to care for. I already was raising my 4 plus now aiding my daughter and grand baby I had lost my sense of self again. Such a struggle for a woman, a mom to be, or know herself. I was not ready to take more on, so I said Street, don’t get any ideas! we are only here to take pictures! He shook his head and new where I was coming from, but his heart swelled with love as the owner put Tank down he ran right into Brian’s leg head first, like a bulldozer. Brian got down on the floor and got all kissed up by this new bestie. His heart was fully invested, yet my fear was saying NO. We left the shop and headed to dinner. We talked over the details of the possibilities and agreed to sleep on it. Somehow, Im not sure of the details, its all but a blur we ended up back at that shop making arrangements to fly home with this new member of our family. We knew our kids would be thrilled! I like dogs, I just don’t agree to say I love them when they are puppies and in need of training and such. I realize now this fear and resistance came from not having a connection to my soul truths. I spent so many years caring for our children, foster children, friends children, children in my girl scout troop, children in my CCD class. I was lost in all the doing for others that the idea of taking care of someone or something else made me cry! But now seeing my husband standing there with Tank, the love in his eyes, the love in both their eyes, It melted all the fear away. Love can do that you know. I made myself laugh when we boarded our flight home thinking about how me the gal who wasn’t the dog lover was the one with a bulldog puppy in a crate as her carryon bag!

Tank was loved by most… he had a honey badger type of personality, he didn’t give a shit pretty much about anything or any house rule we set in place. My husband, loved his new rugged companion with his honey badger attitude to boot. He brought Tank to work with him where Tank took charge of his office and was the gatekeeper of the staircase letting everyone who climbed the stairs of his presence. Tank had his favorite people, and those who liked to harass with his bark and body tanking into them. My brother Paul, the dog whisper of all dog lovers adored Tank. His laugh over Tank stories still warm my heart with the love he had for that dog.

Accidents happen, they are just that accidents. Though they change you forever you can find peace, love and healing in the midsts of your grief. Tank taught our family many lessons about life, anger, and compassion.

Tank taught me to use my voice in a positive loving way to help others forgive and release pain and sorrow that comes from grief, and this action would help me heal the grief I carried. That  every soul comes into your lives for a reason, and if you are open to seeing with your heart rather than your fears, lack and guilt that your life will be forever changed with the compassion that rises from your souls core.

Tank with Brian the day we took him home
Joe dog when he broke his leg

Tank sadly passed away after trying to “Tank” into a moving vehicle, his attitude and essence will forever be etched in our families memories. Lessons I have learned from my fur friends have taught me to be open to inviting love in and expanding my heart without fear. That in loving my family and inviting pets in, I am actually healing  an old wound that created a fear around furry pals. And, finally the most important lesson of all, that just because someone calls my families new puppy a “replacement” I am all the wiser because I am choosing to expand my heart and love love love!

Fur friends are able to share their love from the other side of the veil, just as our human loved ones can. Open you heart and quiet your mind to see and feel them with you. They can also communicate through mediums or pet communicators to send you verbal messages reassuring you of their never ending love!!

Lessons you can learn form a fur friend

Love without restraints

Forgive every chance you  can

Snuggle more

Listen intently without adding your bark

Loyalty

Good-bye is never forever

Enjoy the scenery

 

How you can make a difference 

Become a Foster family for  a fur friend

Adopt

Donate

Volunteer

Visit the elderly, homebound or ill with your fur friend

 

 

Listen in to my radio podcast  Angels Don’t Lie where I connect listeners to their fur friends and more here

If you know someone suffering with grief, please share this with them!

Ps  I would love to hear about your fur friends in the comment section below!

Blessings

xx Jeanne

Grieving The Toxic Relationship

There are complicated emotions and feelings that arise from the loss of a loved one, especially when one is  grieving the loss of a loved one who has caused pain and suffering to you and others during that soul’s life.

Grieving the toxic relationship, one that has left the scars of emotional and or physical wounds brings you down the path of engaging in the memories and events. The abusive relationship stares directly at you as you try to sift through the memories and unfinished business that aid your inner turmoil and end up fueling Shmego’s fearful tone.

The loss relationship deepens the internal conflict of ones private pain carried within the body, which  challenges the natural course of grief from flowing. This is where the block is becomes the wall keeping you hostage in fears prison.

Grief as you may know is also known as bereavement. Bereavement  is the state of a responsive being caused by a loss or a death.

Just a little side note that not all grief is caused from a physical death. Grief is a multi-layered response to loss and comprise physical, emotional and energetic energy.

Grief can be felt and experienced within all the human senses. This is why grief is complicated and unique to each soul.

Spirit offers messages and insights about abusive relationships and how it pertains to grief.

When a person is subjected to abuse, the pain of that relationship is centered around the actions of the abuser.

The victim is then predisposed to fear not only from within but also the energetic fear from their abuser. Separating from abusers fear is challenging to say the least.

Spirit says in order for healing to occur one must be accountable for their actions, reactions and the energy they omit.

To heal grief of any kind especially if you are grieving due to a trauma you must first heal your relationship with your Goddess Soul-Self.

Within The Goddess You twelve principles you will find your pathway to healing what ails you.

Surrender your past over to the Divine, Quiet the tones and memories that hold you in the pain.

Self love will be your pathway to hearing the Divine speak to you.

Forgiveness frees the energetic connection to the abuser.

Taking control of your actions and reactions by inviting love in and calming the feelings of isolation, anger, loneliness, sadness, grief.

Clearing your energy of the old while being in the moment of now.

Releasing the chains to past pains that are the blocks.

Letting go of the stories causing you to stay in the grief like its ground hog day over and over again.

Paying attention to your physical body the energy within your being.

Knowing what serves your well being and what doesn’t serve you.

Be Calm.

Picking yourself up when you crash and not kicking your self when you’re down.

Aligning to your mind, body and spirit.

Listening to your inner intuitive voice.

Today we breached a topic that is not easily discussed. I know first hand of the pain one can carry around from not healing ones grief. I have seen this type of grief cause by physical and mental aliments, illness and even death.

When I ask the Angels about why this happens in life, and why souls will suffer at the hands of another the answer I receive is not easily understood by many but truly the answer to heal ones life. The Angels say repair the relationship with God. The separation from soul to the Divine is where the pain keeps us isolated and in fear. Inviting Divine love is our free will, and is why we are here, To remember God.

Don’t go it alone!

Blessings

xx Jeanne

Miraculous Messages

Miraculous Messages

Before every broadcast of my radio program Angels Don’t Lie, I take time to meditate and connect with the Divine. In my meditation I can ask the Angels and God for the messages that are meant for those who are listening in. The room in which the show is aired transforms with the energy of Divine. The veil where the connection is made, appears before me. The cords of energy I connect to, the same cords that we all have to our loved one’s make themselves available for the connection.
The overall theme for the show is set by the Divine. This is that same for a group reading or if I am teaching a class. The Divine offers the theme as the avenue for the healing energetic tone that is sent during the show or reading. My voice is the pathway for the message to reach you.
Last nights broadcast was one another opportunity for the miraculous messages of healing to reach through the airways. Forgiveness was the main message. The message was to share how I had spent the night before awake in a soul healing. How, during the wee hours of the morning my soul was longing to be free of the entanglement of energy I was not aware I had been still holding in. I was shown by the Angels that forgiveness is layers of energy. That when the mind remembers a past event, the body is holding the memory or energy of the event in. I was also reminded that the memory I was replaying was mirroring back a lesson to be learned. The lesson at hand was again another layer of healing energy for my mind, body and soul. During my non sleep, I also realized that I was not utilizing the tools from The Goddess You principles. How easily, I had let the self-love slip on by without noticing that fear had once again was keeping me from the gift of self love! I prayed for help. I prayed that what I saw in the memory would be healed with love, and that I would honor the lesson being shown by loving and forgiving myself as well as the memory. The miracle was set in motion in the darkness of my bedroom. As I lay there, I witnessed and felt the energy shift, the love flow inward and outward, healing the connection to that old memory.
The message of forgiveness during the broadcast was a powerful one. I asked the listeners to start the New Year off with forgiving and letting go of something they are holding onto so they can achieve their resolution or New Year goal with ease.
This morning while I was journal/praying I was given the message to continue with the topic of forgiveness, by writing about and talking about it. The message was to layer the healing tones with different avenues of media and that when someone is in need, they message will find them. Beautiful!
Each time I am honored with sharing the Divine messages, I am reminded of how grateful I am for the blessings and the gift of mediumship.
I hope that you can find the peace and love forgiveness offers you, and that you reach your goals for the New Year!
Blessings
xx Jeanne

The Drama Vortex

Drama is an action birthed out of a low energetic being. Drama is a fear based thinking brought forth by Ego. Drama’s energy is a vortex that can become a highly addictive behavior. Ego likes this energy because of how it keeps you far from the love thoughts.

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Moments Lost

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Moments lost

Moments Lost
Loosing your way happens so quickly, you may not even notice you’ve lost your way. You just know something is just not right. Being lost can leave you feeling lonely, sad even depressed. You can feel this way even though your surrounded by friends and family. Feelings of being less than slip in out of the blue. Your happiness seems far from your reality. You may smile your way through a family gathering, holiday, party or outing, missing the value of the Joy within moments you’ve just lost.

Being lost can come from a grief you are carrying around. Grief is complicated. You don’t just grieve loved ones or pets you have lost . You grieve lost childhoods, regrets, failures, illness, divorce, life events and or situations. Grief will always be there, but the energetic tone of it can lesson when we learn to recognize the pain caused from grief. Allowing yourself to move through  life after grief can take time and energy along with your willingness to rediscover a new way of processing and living with the grief.

Grief truths
Your grief is very personal and emotional.
You set yourself up to hold onto these griefs as reminders of your loss or because you don’t know how to allow yourself to release the grief.
Grief is never ending but can lessen in pain.
Grief is not you but a life event that you are working through.
Grief can offer you many lessens.

What you may not realize is that the grief that you hold onto has an energetic effect in your life and within your body. The energetic tone that runs through the body is the tone that you live in. Your life then is a reflection of the grief’s energy.

Becoming one with yourself, helps you to recognize and heal the grief.

The first step to recover the sense of who you are is awareness.

List the griefs in order of the most painful to the least painful your life.
Notice if there is any correlation to the way your griefs are listed.
Examples:
a. Loss of a loved one then a divorce
b. Childhood trauma then an illness
c. Divorce then an illness
d. Trauma then a regret
Understanding the energy of the grief is the next step. A quiet mind is needed to reach the energy. Breath awareness helps quiet your mind. Breathe in through the nose into the belly for a count of 10, exhale out the nose to the count of 10. This helps you quiet the mind while connecting to the grief.

3. Next to each grief write the tone, color or energy the grief has.
Example:
a. Anger can be red in color with a hot, sparky tone
b. Sadness can be yellow in color and be a withdrawn feeling
c. Loneliness can be pale blue in color and be an isolated feeling
d. Disconnect can be white in color and be a feeling of poor judgement

4. Next to the grief write down where in your body you feel the energy of the grief.
Example
a. Loss is felt in my heart
b. Childhood trauma is in my lower back
c. Divorce is felt in my gut
d. Trauma is felt in my head
Healing can occur with our permission. Free will to heal. Inviting God in with prayer and an open mind creates space for healing. Releasing allows the healing to take hold. For every action there is a reaction. Forgiveness is the foundation to all healing. Forgiveness frees the body, mind and spirit from the energy of holding on.

5. Now you can ask the grief what is needed in order to heal. Connect with the grief with pen in hand. Close your eyes and allow the breath to bring you to the center of the grief. When the connection is made allow the pen to write or draw any impressions that come forward.

Grief can be the catalyst for change and growth. You can move forward without missing the precious moments of your life.

My personal experience in helping my clients move through grief has been that when you are consumed by the initial grief the flow needed to live in the life is stopped. A stopped life creates space for more suffering in. A forward flowing life creates space for new positive growth to move in. This can be in the form of transforming a simple life to a life of service. Recognizing the grief, hearing the calling for change, inviting healing to take place are the actions to regaining your balance. Once the balance is in place Joy is welcomed back in.

Blessings
xx Jeanne